There are two ways of dealing with details in counselling, and I have witnessed both. In fact I was faced with a classic choice once in a counselling session. I had two top professionals before me, who were at war. One said that we didn't need the details of the war, we needed to deal with the heart. The other insisted that the details were vital, and he had a two-page list to prove it. I said we should go through the details -- and we did. The war came to an end that same hour (or was it two -- with all the details). However, the relationship could not be fully restored. OBSERVATION: This is not the same as a counsellor probing for details that people are protecting. In that case, I probe very gently or not at all.
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