After-Effects [2]

Yesterday I described a situation where a deacon sins, and he is repentant, and the matter is kindly resolved. Now imagine a similar situation, yet not as clear cut. A deacon comes to you for counsel. What has happened is not plainly immoral, but your deacon is in a muddle: his wife slapped him, or he went over his credit limit, or something of that sort. You see him through a difficult time with counsel and prayer. But now, think ahead. There are various ways in which he may process this in future. There may now be a special bond between you. Or there may be an uneasy feeling. Or, there may be what Afrikaners call 'skaamkwaad' -- where shame turns to wrath, or vengeance. OBSERVATION: And you can't predict which it will be. For this reason, I may feel uneasy -- not only in the case of a deacon, but in the case of anyone who has a professional relationship with the minister who has previously been in counselling. And yet, would one want a deacon to hesitate to come for counselling? Here I shall add that it is helpful to state plainly, in counsel and in prayer, that this is about the counselee's relationship with the Lord, not the minister.