I studied leadership at postgraduate level. An interesting statistic, which I cannot place now, was that if one focuses on love as the primary emphasis, one tends to destroy it. As I remember, it introduces a critical spirit: you are loving, you are not, and so on. One needs to de-emphasise love, therefore, to focus on transcendent goals. OBSERVATION: Related to this is the notion that we are family -- with emphasis on family characteristics, rather than being a spiritual family joined by a transcendent goal. The difference might seem subtle, but it can have major effect.
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